With all the tips and tricks out there that are geared toward the parents who have had children for a few years now, and articles teaching them parental hacks to keep them sane, where are all the lists and books helping new parents to cope?
We were all new parents at some point in time, and although I look back now and wish someone would have told me some of these important things, I think that it is imperative to let the new parents and parents to be in on some things that I wish someone would have told me.
Your kids WILL behave better with their grandparents, and with other family members than they do with you. It took me a while to figure this out and it took my mother telling me this repeatedly to even notice it. I recently read something that explains this in a way that made it all make sense to me. It explained the fact that children basically hold it (feelings and true behavior) all in all day, not being able to be their true selves and be free. We as mothers are our children’s garbage disposal for unpleasant feelings and emotions, so the minute they see us they completely let go!
In due time, your child(ren) WILL embarrass you in public. Before I had children, I would look at the mom in the store with the screaming toddler and think to myself “how could she let her child act like that?”…in due time, you will see that even the most mild mannered child will have that random tantrum or outburst in public, you’ll try your best to get them composed, but even the best disciplinarian will occasionally have that experience with their child that they just cannot get in order. Sorry…but its bound to happen (shrugs lol).
No matter how identical your dinner plate (or breakfast, or lunch lol) is to your kids’, yours will always be tastier. They will sit down with their plate and say that they don’t want or don’t like anything in theirs, but as soon as you sit down with plate, they will swarm around you like bees after honey, so just suck it up and let them bite that sandwich.
No matter how well you parent, their grandparents will always question your parenting (lol). This at first, frustrated me to the high heavens, but when a friend told me that most caring and loving grandparents are going to be this way and that they do it out of love I finally began to understand and see things in a different light. So no matter how bundled up you have them in the winter, your mother may have to button that last button; or no matter how many times they’ve eaten that day, when grandma comes around they will automatically be “hungry” again, so just go with the flow and let them be those overbearing, but super loving grandparents that they are. They enjoy that time and so do the kids. There’s nothing like grandma and grandpa’s love.
Becoming a new parent can be both scary and exciting all at once, but the fact of the matter is that everyone enters this “position” with no on the job experience at first. You will make mistakes, you will get frustrated and things won’t always go your way, and that is ok. To them, you will be the greatest person in their world, and they will love you with all of that pure, unconditional, genuine love that they have to give, and it will all fit together like a puzzle.